Day 523 - Curve Ball

Its funny how when you really set your heart and mind to a goal or have a epiphany of sorts.. something, and i mean something.. Always tries to throw you a curve ball. 

Id like to note one thing prior to continuing.. I have made this decision to roll Solo this next 523 days (as in no serious dating, or possibly no dating of any kind.. which means no intimacy of any kind.. I'm still sorting out whether i can manage through the last half.. most likely not. We shall see. This of course being a good tactic to ensure that i do not settle , right?)

 Thats not to say i won't engage with men, talk to them, like them, fantasize about them or flirt with them.. just NO serious dating, because I have big plans that just don't include Men, not for the next 523 days anyways.

So i am only human, and like all humans.. i set out to do something... and i fall.. at least once our twice.

Here i am, 1 day into my No settling, learn to love being alone, learn to grow as a person , get to 30 on your terms plan, and no more then 8 hours into the day.. who am i texting whilst bored after lunch... One of my ex's. The text went something like this :

" Hey, hows it going, long time. Just thought id say hi, see if you were around this weekend. maybe we could grab...." I stopped , gave my head a shake and said WTF lady! pull it together! 1 day and your already fishing.. ( I call this fishing, you know.. we have ALL done it.. your bored, your lonely, or you just want a challenge.. and you fish. I would say i am pretty good at this technique of emptiness filling. As "they' say.. there is Always plenty of Fish in the sea.. HA)

So here is the curve ball..
I choose not to text this ex.. so proud of myself, i give my inner self the old High five your a rock star and went about my day. Then my phone rings, a number i have not seen before. "Hello".. Well look who it is.. Mr Ex. I must of pushed those vibes his way and he picked up the bait and threw it back at me. Not only did i receive the " hey , just wanted to call to say hi . Oh no, it got so much better.  "Hey, I'm moving to calgary, looks like ill be around a lot"  (Its important to mention here that this is the ex that ditched me last minute after leading me to believe i was moving with him, you know, house shopping, the whole bit.. well we packed. He moved).... Lord give me strength!

Lesson of the day.. Watch what you wish for and DO NOT pick up the phone when you don't know the number. That is what voice mail is for,  curiosity is a killer.

Day 1 down.. so far managing well. Determined to culture myself more and broaden my possibilities in life i enrolled in Italian language courses and picked up a book on the Higgs particle. I figure if i can sort out how the universe works then maybe i can work on me next.. avoidance , maybe.. i like to think its organized deferral.


"People underestimate the impact of a new reality"  ~ Joe Incandela

Until next time ..

Jenny